Patience and Persistence: Two Pillars of Mindfulness
A reflection on the importance of patience and persistence in mindfulness practice.
Contemplative practices are present in all contemplative traditions, and although there are differences when it comes to meditation, contemplative teachers within the varied traditions all point to the same thing. Within the Catholic tradition, one of these teachers is Saint Francis de Sales, a Doctor of the Universal Church who lived between 1567 and 1622.
When asked how to meditate, Saint Francis de Sales is quoted to have said the following statement that speaks to the heart of mindfulness:
"Bring yourself back to the point quite gently. And even if you do nothing during the whole of your hour but bring your heart back a thousand times, though it went away every time you brought it back, your hour would be very well employed." (as cited in Dowrick, 2013)
This can be very difficult to do, and Francis de Sales is quoted to have further said that, “what we need is a cup of understanding, a barrel of love, and an ocean of patience” (as cited Kornfield, 1993, p. 58), to do this.
This speaks also to what Jon Kabat-Zinn wrote in his book Full Catastrophe Living, that,
“Mindfulness does not bulldoze through resistance. You have to work gently at the edges, a little here and a little there, keeping your vision alive in your heart, particularly during the times of greatest pain and difficulty.” (Kabat-Zinn, 1990, p. 299)
Starting with Francis de Sales' statements and continuing on to Kabat-Zinn, what is being said here captures the essence of meditative discipline. They are pointing us to two elements: the persistent redirection of the wandering mind, as de Sales points out, but this has to be tempered with patience. The mind will wander away, and as Kabat-Zinn says, we cannot bulldoze our way through the mind.
This makes me remember of times within my practice when I actually tried to bulldoze through the mind. Times where I fought through distraction, trying to make it go away, trying to achieve the perfect practice to no avail.
But going to what de Sales and Kabat-Zinn say it makes me remember that mindfulness is not about achieving perfection or having no distractions but rather inviting a compassionate awareness of our thoughts and emotions.
The nature of contemplative practice is not defined by reaching some grand achievement, but a path defined by the cumulative impact of small, deliberate actions performed with genuine dedication tempered with patience. Each moment, our mind wanders away in our practice and patiently diligently returning our focus with kindness and compassion to the present moment; that is a statement within our practice—a statement of commitment to our inner growth moment by moment, step by step.
A statement that defines contemplative practice. Why? Because our mind is bound to get distracted wander away one moment or another. It is part of the practice, and that moment when we become aware of distraction is a moment when we can cultivate mindfulness, an opportunity to change the way we are relating to experience.
I often say to students there is no mindfulness practice without a wandering mind. Mindfulness practice and contemplative practice, in general, are possible because the mind wanders away into distraction.
And as Saint Francis de Sales and Jon Kabat-Zinn elude the first step might be to embrace the inherent messiness of our human experience, acknowledging that our minds are prone to wander as our hearts are prone to stray. Yet, within the midst of distraction, there is value in the simple act of bringing ourselves back to awareness, time and time again, with patience and persistence.
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References
Dowrick, S. (2013). Heaven on earth: Timeless prayers of wisdom and love. New York, NY: Penguin Group.
Kabat-Zinn, J. (1990). Full catastrophe living: Using the wisdom of your body and mind to face stress, pain and illness. New York, NY: Delacorte.
Kornfield, J. (1993). A path with heart: A guide through the perils and promises of spiritual life. New York, NY: Bantam Books.